The sins of the father


You ever stop and think that your parents weren't always right? Or say things like, "I'll never be like you to my kids"? It seems that my not so fragile world took another hit recently. I was at a Thanksgiving party my friend's parents were having and my best friend's mom was a little drunk and told me something I never knew. But to set the stage: My best friend's name is Billy and I lived more at his house then with my family. Well his family offered to take me into their home for the last 2 years of high school because my father was getting a new job one state away. The only thing was that my dad gave them legal rights over me in case of an emergency. Also he agreed to pay them $250 a month for rent.

This sounded like a great deal for me. And even though there were a few bad things that happened in that two years I lived with them, it was still better then if I moved away with my father.

Back to the story. Billy's mom is drunk and she says she was very saddened that my father would hand me over to pretty much strangers (they never meet but I told him they were good people) and that after about 4 months my father didn't make regular or full payments to them and they let me stay. Granted they ask me to leave the week after graduation but I understand now. Also, the legal waiver he gave them was only good for a year. Had I gotten ill the following year I would be in trouble. Basically she said she couldn't understand how a father could treat his son so poorly. And really that sums up my childhood. I once told someone that the car my father gave me for graduating college was the nicest thing he's ever did for me. But really how sad is that? He never really showed love for me and I have suffered emotionally for it. Now I feel I owe Billy's parents money and I still haven't confronted my father. I don't know if I even should.

And now I think has my father permanently hurt me? Will I be a selfish too? I know that I already shut people out and think very selfishly. Am I doomed to follow in his ways. I pray that I do not. For the sins of the father, may fall on his children.